I am a GREAT aunt. Wow just saying that makes me feel like I need to grab a hover round and start saying, "when I was a little girl" lol. My niece J.J. had little T.J. yesterday morning. She was 7 1/2 months pregnant, so he is a preemie. So for the next few months he will be in the NICU. He is doing good though. He is breathing with little help, maintaining body temp, and a whooping 3 pounds. Mother is doing good also. This is her first baby and she had a c-section. I remember my first c-section. It was painful, scary, and recovery sucked. She is a strong girl so I know she will pull through. I am preparing her for that roller coaster ride of the NICU for the months ahead. I went through it for 5 months with Monique. Everyday either brought tears of joy or tears of anguish. She has a huge support system so I am confident we will get her through this rough patch. However I don't think I can get the courage to go to the NICU. It just brings back old memories, sadness, and very painful reminders. I hope she can understand that. Even when I go to hospitals I steer clear of the NICU floor at all costs. Maybe its not dealing with it or I am avoiding the pain, whatever. It's been 13 years since my angel baby was born, she would have been 13 years old now. You would think after 13 years I would have dealt with the ghosts of the past. However I don't think you ever get over the loss of your child. Time eases the hurt, but it sits in your heart inside the hole that once was. You learn to smile, laugh, and enjoy life again, but on a very different level. It is never the same again. But let me not turn this into me. It is about my great nephew and the joy of new life. So congrats to my niece!!
